Hours of Life

Walked into the bathroom and i was so happy to see a loofa hanging on the wall
I can't bathe properly without a loofa!
I am spoilt.
And the best time of a weekday,
is this.
When I'm trapped in a space of our mine,
I tend to be very different, maybe cranky.
And I let my thoughts run wild.

I tend to think alot when I bathe,
not really important practical stuffs,
but stuffs which i want to think about.
So let me capture some parts,
unedited, the exact words.

A bunch of light greenish phelgmish-looking gel began to spat out of my welch sports body bath, as I tried to catch it with my loofa. Loofa Loofa, since how long have I whined to mum about the last spoilt one. I believe i have not been rough with it.

And I thought of one upset incident I faced early afternoon today, when a patient actually demanded my name to lodge a complaint because I declined to sell her any cough mixture, i know she is addicted to it. The records shows, and I have for the past 3 months, rejected her many a times, giving her alternatives, suggested her to see a doctor, and she promised me her last time was the last. Today, i did not talk much to her, I did not listen to her stories, because the truth was blatant, she knows it too. So I forcefully drew out my staff pass from the retractable clip stuck on my white coat, and allowed her plently of time to scribble down my name. I rather loose my license or my job than to feed an addict's habit. later on, i saw boss at the photocopying machine, and joked to him to be prepared for a letter of complaint for me. ha!

There's nothing much special today, except for one unexpecting moment, i saw my colleage swivel around her swivel chair and popped a sourish preserved something into her mouth, and I turned and jokingly asked her: Eh are u pregnant? eat those type of thing. And she looked at me, and said " Yes. Shh.. My mouth dropped to the ground. manz.... I took about 10 mins to recover from the shock, she's pregnant!! My god. i can't imagine me being in her shoes, but I can feel the great joy in me. So i congratulated her, some 20 mins later, while she tried to control her nausea. And,... she's quitting her job this month. I just told her I want to be able to see her baby, and that i am really very happy to hear this news. And I starting thinking of life's stages and how one should transit from one to another in an orderly, timely manner. I remember my GP teacher said there is nothing wrong if one should skip or reverse or jump about stages, like marrying and starting a family first, then starting a career.

The newly bought silkpro pink has a nice smell.

And quite suddenly, the lyrics of a familiar song came to me:

You ask me if I love you
And I choke on my reply
I'd rather hurt you honestly
Than mislead you with a lie
And who am I to judge you
On what you say or do?
I'm only just beginning to see the real you
Romance and all its strategy
Leaves me battling with my pride
I'm just another writer
Still trapped within my truth
A hesitant prize fighter
Still trapped within my youth
At times I understand you
And I know how hard you've tried
I've watched while love commands you
And I've watched love pass you by

I remember singing it at a ktv,
and 5 minutes later, while I mumbled the last word,
while waiting for the music to end,
my friend turned to me and asked:
Actually what does the song mean ar?
so she love him or not?
I pondered...and answered:
Er.. actually I dunno leh?
So.
Any one could enlighten us about this nice but puzzling song?

Sometimes When We Touch - Dan Hill

You ask me if I love you
And I choke on my reply
I'd rather hurt you honestly
Than mislead you with a lie
And who am I to judge you
On what you say or do?
I'm only just beginning to see the real you

And sometimes when we touch
The honesty's too much
And I have to close my eyes and hide
I wanna hold you til I die
Til we both break down and cry
I wanna hold you till the fear in me subsides

Romance and all its strategy
Leaves me battling with my pride
But through the insecurity
Some tenderness survives
I'm just another writer
Still trapped within my truth
A hesitant prize fighter
Still trapped within my youth

And sometimes when we touch
The honesty's too much
And I have to close my eyes and hide
I wanna hold you til I die
Til we both break down and cry
I wanna hold you till the fear in me subsides

At times I'd like to break you
And drive you to your knees
At times I'd like to break through
And hold you endlessly

At times I understand you
And I know how hard you've tried
I've watched while love commands you
And I've watched love pass you by

At times I think we're drifters
Still searching for a friend
A brother or a sister
But then the passion flares again

And sometimes when we touch
The honesty's too much
And I have to close my eyes and hide
I wanna hold you til I die
Til we both break down and cry
I wanna hold you till the fear in me subsides

As i pushed the silver handle to the cold end,
a rude splash of cold water shot through,
and I felt it was some painful necessity I always here from beauty talks,
that cold water can shrink your pores, firm up the skin after the long soak.

I've never loved to bathe.
But I like the feeling of being light and breezy on walking out of it.
And more so, I loved the thoughts i think in that tiny space on earth, and in time.

Walked past the foggy mirror and thought, i looked better without a fringe. Heh.


You know how someone has to take minutes during a meeting?
This is the hours of my Life.
I have never thought of how important or what meaning/purpose does recording a past event has. It has no clear meaning, only for the one who truely matters, or takes the time to think about oneself, and others, in time to come.


********************************

Honesty.
It is a very difficult thing to do.