start

saw my family off the taxi cos no space for me,
so i didn't go to the habour today

just came home from bugis
cos my bro wants to go there to dine
so i accompanied him
he and his army full gear
wierd looking creature, with cap, uniform, boots, hoizontal bagpack
hahaa and we get wierd stares

he say ' wear liddat cannot jay walk'
so we went to find many traffic lights

and we went simlim cos i heard it is not safe for gals to go there alone near night time
why?
anyway, we picked this retro looking mouse for me,
which i regretted buying...
too loud.

and made way to long johns to feast out on junk food before he goes in to tekong
poor guy
and i had to take note of every 5 minutes.. cos cannot be late.
as he gagged about what happened in army and training
and we ran to the mrt station as he had to reach pasir ris mrt at 9pm sharp.
so i saw him off at the mrt control.

and shopped around until at 9pm, i smsed
me: u reached?
he at 11.25pm: yar now going to sleep liao. remember to close all the windows before you go out, you always forget to close one. And take care.




BAAAHhhhhhhhhhhhh


I miss my family.
************************
6 more lonely nights to go...

msn

友：meet any nice guys
我：guys... dun have lar
友: or is there anyone who is waiting for you?
我: no one waiting lar ( turns behind** no one following**)
友: u got stalked by this guy
我: dun dare to call his hp, never call. dun dare to go plaza anymore


看来我是更需要开导的
*********************

友:有缘千里来相会，无缘见面不相识
我: wah ur chinese damn cheem sia

has been pretty quiet around here lately

I lurve this song verrrrrrrrrry much.

home alone

yep

my brother is going back into army this weekend
my dad is going back to work overseas,
and bringing my family along.

so homealone for me for one whole week.


I have a couple of things lined up:

including lectures, clinical discussions and meetings all outside of work time,
and a list of things to complete everyday involving the house...

But i am somehow looking forward to it.
Buying my dinner and outrageously eating at the coffee table infront of the tv, and putting my sodagreen cd into my father's bose system and testing out the sound system.. woohoo (shhh). Gonna try making a ceddar salad drizzled with olive oil, only that I cannot really differentiate which are for cooking only and which could be taken straight from bottle. (??) Gonna revamp the house abit, tiding up here and there before they come home one week later. And perhaps, trying on some masks which have been sitting around for quite some time. maybe try to sip some of my dad's redwine hahahahahahahahahaaaa. (shhh)


So many things to do...


But i will sure miss them though.

************************
思念是一种很眩的东西

对 我一直都在看这个

李伯恩
你简直太帅了
好man
请不要不要减肥
我喜欢胖胖的！
看起来就很想抱抱。哈哈
我也会当你的恩客。

YEA！！
硬搞rules!

我觉得李伯恩的心态非常健康


***************************
you're beautiful

it's true.

流汗记

偷懒了一阵子
该写写点什么东西
填填空

昨天放工后就偷偷的
跑去吃rum and raisin icecream waffle
然后被朋友发现了
好久不见的中学同班男同学
然后聊起来我的ice cream就溶化没有了
昨天还让我遇到好多好久不见的朋友

然后接着我就去买爸爸生日的礼物
走到店门都关上了
才发现自己还没有吃晚饭
而且买的东西多数是给自己的

感觉好久没有放工后还可以看见太阳

最近的气温也让人直冒汗

很多朋友都请假到别地去旅游了
偏偏没人请我一起去


所以我很闷

也因为闷
我每天晚上都卧在电脑前看[太王四神记]
掀起了我以往非常喜欢看古装戏的兴趣
那其实都在看帅哥
但是这次我是因为帅美女而夜夜锁定
哈哈哈哈



躲不开夏天已到来的事实
连坐着不动也会一直流汗

*************************

流流流流流流流流流流
流流流流流流流流流流流流流流流
流流流流流流流流流流
流流流流流流流流流流流流流流流流流流流流流流流流流
流
流流流流流
流流流
流流流
流流
流


汗

这样的我

Some very rude and ignorant patient just shouted at me today.
Got up on my nerves, that damned fellow.
I almost ribbed off my jacket and slap him on the face.

But I got hold of myself.


what to do? My jacket tells me i am a ********** and I cannot do it.



to the idiot:
GO N DIE

******************************

我喜欢跟朋友开玩笑
会让我很开心
能表现出来的开心
前天跟朋友去K
能唱到方大同的歌，感觉很爽。
我们再来一次！



******************************

and I roamed the streets of orchard that afternoon
the sun was shinning,
people were sweating.

I stepped onto the escalator

the couple infront of me held hands in crossed-fingers fashion

and the words occurred suddenly to me

in sickness, and in death...




love is always around me.
Around.
But not in me.


******************

那样的你
要很久才相聚

开心的啦

刚从KTV 回来
能发泄一番
感觉
好爽啊

哈哈哈哈！！



突然觉得
音乐就是一种feedback
经过思考发出来的音是你领听后再回音而又感觉

不够

这几天


我更觉得自己还是一个很无知的孩子


因为我发现我不会关心身边的人
任何人
因为我一直都感受到身边的人在关心我
为我做好事情
而我不懂得付出同样的回报



真糟糕。




成熟
这个东西
我想我还占不到一点边缘

该怎么拥有呢？





如果
这都取决于
爱
的话
那
我想我
内心不够
也就付不出相等的


*************************
该怎么有爱呢？
对人类的一种爱。

这么晚了

这么晚了
忍不住想写一些

本来星光二班里我没有喜欢任何人
听了看了也就忘了

直到Da Q 被淘汰的那一场
我还记得他唱的那首歌

觉得他是唯一一个能完全用语气感动我的
他的歌声象温暖的棉被怀绕着我
觉得他很man

ok就将

现在的星光三班非常红
也非常好看
声音我喜欢走神经系的黄靖伦的底音
加油我们的新加坡同类！

*********************************

今天去买台湾小珍珠奶绿茶
突然好想念去台湾游玩的日子
真的很开心

朋友一定幸福

今天早上起身
开朗的心情
天空的太阳晒成那样
我的房间象烘炉那样
不过心情还是愉快
想起昨天朋友的事
为她感到快乐


**************************
突然有一首歌
‘爱要耐心等待 仔细寻找 感觉很重要
宁可空白了手 等候一次 真心的拥抱
我相信这个世界上 一定会遇到
对的人
出现在眼角’


=) 朋友终於找到幸福了 =)




*************************
I lost my voice today,
i guess from all the fun we had at mind cafe yesterday
gaging at our games and responses..
hahahaaaaaa
Pictionary was the best.
As it showed me what imaginative creatures my friends can be.

I like my voice now,
very husky.

Bday gathering @ Mind cafe

刚从生日聚会回来
发现
我的要好朋友交了男朋友
天啊！
而且还瞒了我们将近半年
你说气不气？

但是我们就聊了感情的事情
我才发现
感情需要彼此的了解和容让
男朋友是比较理性
朋友也变得理性
这样很好啊
只要有了共同点，出发
彼此能有沟通的空间
感情路就不会太坎坷
毕竟两个完全不相识的人
要走在一起
是需要很多的。。
说话，了解，尝试，付出。。
其实朋友也没有变得不一样，
头发还是乱乱的，穿着也还是一样朴素，
但是，
当我看见她很认真的在诉说感情事，
就觉得她好迷人呕。
爱情带来的变化很微妙，
那可能不是别人会察觉的事，
那可能和任何人都无关，
但是
那是你知道的就好。


本人，
比较感性，
其实非常感性，
所以交不到男朋友，
要我变得理性，
我可能一辈子做不到也无法改变。
所以与其说找不到适合的人，
不如说我其实不适合任何人。
除非，
有个了解我，容忍量极大的人看上我，
原来的我。
如果没有这样的人，
爱情不值得我浪费太多感情或泪水，
我自己一个人其实已经很好了。


Yesterday got stopped by a guy
who passed me his namecard and wanted to make friends.
i was ok with it initially,
until i got home and mum warned me he might be a con man.
but i don't look rich, nor pretty.
And the guy looked decent enough,
so ok I finally gave up the idea of calling,
since mum says such guy might be pretty loose.
其实还蛮抗拒爱情这个东西的。
没有把握的人请不要随便说你喜欢我，
因为我不是那么好喜欢的人。
以前说过，
it takes a great man to want to like me.


back to today
告别那时，
我说朋友请你加油！


(因为简单的爱情的背后其实要付出很多的努力)
************************************
是记忆美化了人，
还是人美化了记忆？

updates

最近，也不算很忙。
我想，工作环境不一样吧。还是工作的需求变了。还是自己的态度已经不一样。
但是，最近就没有在想很多事情，就是很投入的做我该做的事情。
日子淡淡的，平凡的。我想，这就是一种简单生活吧。
但是，我开始寻找别的， 东西。平凡是很好，没错，它是很好。但是；
但是我想都是我的个性，可能比较澎湃，比较向往刺激，或什么，
总觉得我不够满足，我要找更多，的东西。
我想，这就是人吧！

无论，
工作上的成就感，
未来的规划，
兴趣的追逐，
我都想要。


反而，
也不知道为什么的，
已经觉得不向往爱情，
已经觉得爱情留在等待区就好，
隔在一边，
你不去离它，它也不会吵到你，
只是暂时占了一点你的位而已。
渐渐，
我已经觉得爱情，

也没有什么好期待的。


**********************************




work has been fine.
I've got a couple of compliments from my patients yesterday.
An indonesian patient complimented me on my youth, knowledge and (looks)
I pretty much backed away, strugling not to blush under my professional and mature outer shell. but, blushing is very much me. There is no way to hide that.
And I must be alil mad to be happy the whole day because someone said I was pretty, wahahahahahhaaaa, I hope I can believe that. And it didn't help when all my colleagues were all around. This, is not a contest, but a service we are doing for mankind, and hope to do it with the right attitude and heart.

Maybe I should take up something, to learn in my free time. song writing, guitar, japanese? I've got to do something, when I miss my friends and they cannot be around with me, and to find an outlet for all the energy trapped within me.



*************************




And the part on horoscope today on ST Life! says, as I catch a glimpse:
You need to make sure that you have at least a little time for romance today, even if you are single. You should find that it is easier than ever to attract the right kind of attention.


yeah, right..
(did it get manipulated by the SDU of soemthing?)

In my bag

The stuffs I lug to work everyday

From the top:
My sky blue umbrella which plunges me into a sea of calmness whenever it sprouts open on a rainy day, no matter how heavy the rain will be, how gloomy the sky may be.

Sony erricson handphone, my trusty brand which marries style, function and fun. Lots of pictures of where I have went alone, recordings of autograph sessions i went of live performances like khalil fong.

Samsung U3 colour your world mp3 player in a silicon case which tends to muffle out its shocking colour intensity, kinda like me cos i am loud on the inside.

Olive green wallet with a metallic butterfly design on its covers which I don't actually like. It has to be durable and dirtiable because of the many places I lunch and dine at.

Sweets in mango flavour but actually tastes more peachy than mango-ey, it says sugar free and Les Bonbons klein, but I hardly pop them. Sweets have to be sugar free if they want to be kept in my bag, because I eat it only during bluemoon days and so to keep out the ants.

Notes written on recycled papers and a weekly organiser, I like that I can actually see one week in a glance and one year at a glance; read: big picture.

Pilot Rexgrip 0.7 pen in a nice ocean blue casing, it is new. For the simple reason that I so often misplace it and then see it in another's hand. I have lost about 8 pieces of this pen in both its sunny yellow and ocean blue colours, and have got no courage to ask for return. I have a bunch of these now sitting on my desk.

Black nylon holey pouch which keeps the important stuffs in (entrance card, keys, triangle amulet) and unwanted stuffs out (dirt, foul smells).

Lavender see-through card case with my Uni ezlink (which I so often use to get student prices at fast food outlets), and name cards of my boss etc.

Citrus orange canvas pouch where all my symptom-relief medicines go, pen, gloss and foundation, vitamins, et cetera. it also keeps out the rain from the important stuffs. How i got this came from an amusing story when i was walking around town aimlessly one saturday afternoon after work, and I went into a bookstop playing a very nice song, I could not make out who it was then, but the melody just flooded me with memories, and its lyrics clear like a clean, unpolluted beach where the stones of truth just stood beneath the water, not very far from the surface. I didn't know what i was doing there, but walked out of the shop when the song ended, with this orange thing in my hand, not having realised I had paid for it. (I've got receipt too). And I later took down one phrase of the lyrics, ploughed through the net and found the title to be 左边, by sodagreen, of which i came to love very much later on.

Nivea pearl gloss in nude shade, Water cool mint balm in a baby blue metallic casing, ZA gloss vibrante, all of which I hardly use ( I have a collection of gloss and balms which are as good as new), and my trusty Za clever foundation with a generous spread of mirror.

Cloth and leather combi clutch bag which has a country and down to earth look, embellished with a handphone accessory with the letter A in baby pink, a gift from my lil sister for my last birthday ( I don't know where else to put it), a little something to remember me of my family whereever i may be.

and the date on the foto is wrong, i took it today 1/5/08


Happy labour day

**************************************




A closer look

(blur)